Governor Hickenlooper, yes, that's his name, has formally applied to have a Space Portal built in our state, which means we would be primed to accommodate the commercial space flight/supply needs of the Outer Realm. (It also means that if the sh*t hits the fan and we continue to greatly ignore Climate Change that we Coloradans will not have to drive south of our border to New Mexico to flee the catastrophe.)
If approved, this would be just the newest of our portals, some of which you may not have heard. I'll set them to music for you:
1. The "T. T. Rider": This is the loophole in Mr. Tebow's contract with the Broncos that lets him opt out, come The Rapture.
2. The "Stairway to Golden": The Coors Light you see at the end of a very drunken tunnel.
3. The "You Say Goodbye and I Say Hollow": In this version of beetlemania, the pine beetle takes perfectly good stands of ponderosa and turns them into Swiss trees.
There you have it: One hole for every "O" in our name. Now if we can just become spacemen! (We're pretty close to the sky as it is, you know.
No comments:
Post a Comment