Sucky McSuckerson

     I was gonna write about how I did better in Week Three with a 27-9 record. I was gonna say that hey, beats the heck out of my lousy Week One showing AND I've learned to NEVER change a prediction mid-sentence. (I bow to the Lesson of Louisiana Tech.)
   
But as I'm all giddily totaling up my Ws and Ls, I realize that I didn't make 35 predictions last weekend, I made 36. How exactly can I go about spinning a yarn in which some phoenix rises from the ashes of failure only to emerge with a piece of toilet paper stuck in her beak? (I'm having flashbacks of Sissy Spacek in "Carrie": All smiles and foolish adoration. Oh, and the killin' and whatnot.)
   
 Pride certainly does cometh, and probably before the following were invented: spellchecker, time to read through once more for errors, concentration in middle age, etc. But I have no excuses now because we have a pill or potion for nearly everything. I should really check into...wait, what was I saying?
   
But you know our human error can still best the electronic brains from time to time; once my spellchecker insisted on continuing to change the word "parents" to "paranoia" even after I told it to stop. So obviously that proves...oh nevermind!
   
 Some Week Three Fun Facts:
     *I was right about Utah possibly upsetting BYU, I just didn't pick 'em--but OH am I glad I stayed up for the ending, ending, ending of that game!
     *I'll NEVER pick against my beloved Stanford again
     *I TOLD you CU is worse than awful
     *Jeff Tedford/Ted Jefford is really pissing me off, which is saying a lot as I was IN THE STANDS at Memorial Stadium in Berkeley when he FORGOT how to manage a clock and THREW AWAY the number one ranking! (grudge much, susy?)
     *PIGS and MIDSHIPMEN: I will not be pulling for you guys again. You burn me like a hot sauce enema yet I still keep coming back for more. No honey, he won't be calling you and Arkansas and Navy will not win for you. Face it boys: I'm done with the lot of you until, well, until pigs float, or sail maybe. So Suey Me!
   
The one and only thing I got right in all of this was to skip a week. Imagine how many fewer mistakes I'd make if I skipped TWO weeks?! (You'll have to because I cannot help myself.) So no even weeks, just odds. I like the odds of odds. And I speak the language, fluently.