Bachmann Turns Up Hyperdrive

Thank the rock for lifting and giving us Michele Bachmann. Certainly no one else has her finger on the world in quite the same fashion. (I'm picturing a woman emerging from a restroom with toilet paper stuck to her stiletto, but feel free to draw your own image.)

First she stretches her oratory to the height of "tee-shirt logic" with this little gem: If you tax everybody something then they'll "get the mentality" (lovely phrase that) that Freedom isn't free. They need to pay for getting to live in this great country, she maintains. And you know what, Michele? They'll also "get the mentality" that living below the poverty level and contributing to payroll taxes--as well as all our consumer taxes--isn't enough. This America place exacts a hefty cover charge, now doesn't she?

Secondly, Michele redirects us toward the shiny objects of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac: They ask for government funding then pay out huge bonuses to their top 10 people. Huh, reminds me of some other segment of our population. A small percentage, but I just cannot recall...corpor...Wall St...oh, look, it's Elvis' birthday again!

And finally, and certainly most importantly, Representative (of what I'm never sure) Bachmann, now a theater critic, tells us that "the Chinese are bad actors". She must sit on some pretty heavy duty committees to get that kind of national security briefing! Just when I thought she'd made her point, she went on to add that "they sent us some bad computer chips" which we're using at the Pentagon! For our weapons systems! I can just hear all the little old men on their little old typewriters in their little old basements clicking away at their little old conspiracy theories. But seriously, China may pose certain threats, including cyber-security concerns, but whenever Michele says it, I just cannot separate the message from the messenger. There she is with her toilet paper shoe again, walking around with her hair on fire, hoping the rocks will release her fellow trolls soon.

And that's when we will all need our safe-rooms for sure!